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Bad shit is going to happen, and bad feelings are going to come from that bad shit, and that's normal. It's even normal to feel sorry for ourselves when bad shit happens to us, sometimes folks sink a little too deep into self-pity and then bad shit turns to worse shit. Feeling sorry for ourselves helps us feel connected to something, but if we do it too much, we begin to isolate ourselves from everything and everyone else. People who use self-pity aren't bad people, they may just not have explored other ways to feel better. We gotta do what we gotta do to feel better and heal, so we can keep moving. I respect that healing takes time, but I also want to stress that we can be doing a lot to slow down the healing, and even make our pains worse. Posting our problems on social media is easier than doing 10 pushups, but do it long enough and things will get worse. Have compassion for yourself, but don't fall into a hole of pity, it doesn't help as much as you think. In the beginning when the wounds are fresh, self-pity might be the only way, but as time goes on, we need to make sure we evolve past pity into something more productive to keep that healing up. Everyday someone breaks their heart, and everyday they think they're the only one, but they're not. Pain is a part of life, it's not your enemy, it's your teacher, and we can start paying attention to the lessons it's teaching us, once we stop feeling sorry for ourselves.
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