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I Wonder What Gabriel Is Up To

Grade 1.. MamaPoet knitted that sweater, it has my initials on the chest. ⁣

I remember being the first kid in class who got to choose his partner for a field trip, and the other kids predicted I'd pick my best friend Gabriel. It bothered 6 year old me, that they thought I was so predictable, so I picked someone else, a girl, and we had to hold hands, during the peak of the cooties pandemic, with no circle circle dot dot vaccines in sight. It was a miserable field trip, and I brought it upon myself; all because I wanted to be different. ⁣

How often that moment has replayed itself in my life. I was destined to be an unnecessarily difficult weird kid/adult. As MamaPoet said to me a few days ago "you were born straight, but have been upside down ever since" or as my first mentor told me back in uni "you're unique, and I don't mean that as a compliment"⁣

I've done alright as a weirdo though, ,and the more I embrace it, the more other weirdos find me. I'm not picking random girls for field trips anymore (sorta), but I am avoiding social media trends, and not watching anything on Netflix top 10 list. Maybe I still suffer from "being different for the sake of being different", or maybe I'm just different. I don't think it matters either way as long as I like myself, and spend time around people who accept me as I am. ⁣

I bet if we all looked back at our younger years, we'd pick up on patterns that inform our present. It brings up an interesting conversation about our destiny and obsessions. How much of who we are is in our control, and how much of it is simply making space to be what we've always destined to be. I shouldn't have to unnecessarily complicate a #TBT, but I just did. ⁣

I don't think it's a negative thing if we've been pre-coded to be something, discovering that may make life feel it's easiest. It's an inward journey we all deserve to take. #LOVE #UNLEARN

I wonder what Gabriel is up to.
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